How to learn Self-Compassion

Having Self-Compassion is often times really hard to find in oneself. In my opinion, you need to have self-love before self compassion can begin. We tend to be our own worst inner critics and demand perfection from ourselves. When our unrealistic goals are not met, this is when the inner critic invites itself in. Think about it. Why would we want to treat ourselves like this, if we would not even treat our friend like this. This is where self compassion comes into play and the inner critic goes away.
It is essential that we treat ourselves with. loving kindness and nurture a healthy relationship with one. Here are the steps I believe you need to take:

1) Practice mindfulness – Stay in the present and practice meditation. Incorporate this on a daily basis. There are some great meditations on self-compassion.

2) Treat yourself as you would treat your best friend – If you wouldn’t say this to a friend, then don’t say it to yourself.

3) Write & say positive affirmations that foster a healthy well being – First thing in the morning, look in the mirror and say “I love you and you are loved”. At night, write down 3 things that you are grateful for in your day.

To love oneself is a life long journey and takes practice as that is why there are so many books on this subject. Here is an article written on the benefits of Self-Compassion

The Scientific Benefits of Self-Compassion

The Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education > Uncategorized > The Scientific Benefits of Self-Compassion Written By Dr. Emma Seppala

Self-compassion involves treating oneself as one would a friend, being more mindful, and understanding our situation in the context of a larger human experience. When we can be more understanding and gentler with ourselves, identify less with the emotions that surround our mistakes, and understand that failure is a normal part of the larger human experience, we become stronger and more successful in the long run. We become stronger and more resilient. And, as Sri Sri Ravi Shankar so simply puts it, the state of your life depends on the state of your mind. So be kind to yourself.

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